Friday, March 27, 2009

Two weeks.....

We've been "officially waiting" for two weeks today. I wish I knew who has looked at our book (if anyone...) the agency said that we can call for an update each month or so (her words). She clearly does not know that that's my invitation to call EACH month on the dot to see what's going on. Ha!

I am trying to be patient.

This week has been really hard for me. We are two weeks away from spring break and I am literally It is not the's me. I am reliving last spring and summer with a bit of panic. Grayson is playing baseball on the same exact field with the same coach and lots of the same kids. I am having flashbacks to conversations I had with my sister in law, Jada, last year at this time while Grayson was playing ball. She and my brother Brandon had just started their infertility assessments and I remember saying. "Oh Jada! I just know you are going to be pregnant by October!" Little did we know that my sweet, gentle, loving, teddy bear of a brother would have been dead a month in October. See where I'm coming from? Awful.

I have the most precious class. They are darling and sweet and love me so much. They have truly been God's gift to me this year. Amazing when you look back on it that He would speak straight to my Principal's hand as she was making class roles to give me just this division of the upcoming kindergartners. Their parents are wonderful, too. I would have had to quit if they were not so sweet.

I'm trying to get myself out of this.....this...whatever it is.......I feel like I can't breathe......

Can't stop the drownin', Princess.....can't stop the drownin'

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